Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Things that your Wedding doesn't Need

There are so many things that you need to have or do at your wedding.  Here are somethings that you can skip...most of these are outdated traditions that have lived there usefulness.

Money Trees/Dollar Dances

These were very popular in the 80's when couples were marrying younger and needed the extra spending cash.  In a age where couples are spending upwards of $25,000 on there weddings, doesn't it seem alittle inappropriate to ask your guests to participate in this tradition?

Announcements During your Ceremony

The best part of a wedding is watching a bride walk down the aisle, it's magical.  The next moment when the minster says "We are gathered here today..." and then everyone knows to sit down.  This moment should not be followed by, "please remember to turn off your cell phone" - I actually witnessed this at a wedding last year.  This was after walking past a sign in the foyer that asked me to it.  Please make sure that you cover this with the minister.  People do have a enough sense to turn there ringers off.

Cameras on the Tables at the Reception

In today's world everyone has a cell phone with a camera (even my parents).  Instead, join Instagram create a hashtag and then let your guests know.  Imagine how much fun you will have on your honeymoon exploring the pictures your guests took.  Leave little signs like the one below all over your ceremony (don't forget the program) and reception.

Photo Credit: The Frisky
Cash Bars
Even if you don't have a huge budget for alcohol for your big day, limit the drinks served, not the amount.  A guest should never have to pay for anything after they enter your wedding.
Plan on!!

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Choosing a Wedding Officiant

The newest trend in wedding ceremonies seems to be having a friend or family perform the ceremony.  Most of the them choose to become ordained on-line.  I have mixed feelings on this.  I have seen this go well, and have seen this go poorly. 

Not Everyone Can Officiate a Wedding

If a couple decides to go down the road of having a friend perform the ceremony, there are some important ground rules you will want to establish.

  • Tone of your Ceremony - serious or silly, make sure you are on the same page
  • Stick to a Script - ask to read what they plan to say before the big day, no surprises
  • Attire - suits (matching tie to the wedding colors) - for the ladies a dress, that complements the wedding colors
  • Make sure they attend the rehearsal, so they know what is expected
  • Research the paperwork - make sure all the licenses needed are completed
  • Treat them as part of the wedding party
Hiring a Professional

It may be your best option, and in my opinion the least stressful one.  Here are something to consider

Where do you find one?

  • Ask for referrals - family, friends, co-workers
  • The Knot - that is where I found mine!
  • Ceremony Site - they will typically have a list of preferred officiants

What to ask them?

  • What is your typical ceremony like?
  • Will you give (or not give) a sermon?
  • Will you allow us to personalize our ceremony?
  • How many times will we meet prior to the wedding?
  • Will you attend the rehearsal?
  • Do you have any references we can call?
Typically, when you are paying an officiant they will let you do pretty much whatever you want to do, but it doesn't hurt to ask.

How much is a Wedding Officiant?

Budget to spend around $200 dollars.  Once you've paid the fee, and I would pay them up front before the date, it is completely acceptable to tip the remaining money you budgeted.  But, just like with having a friend, make sure they understand your vision for your day.

Couple of more things...

  • Invite the officiant and their spouse/significant other to the wedding/reception
  • Make sure to get a picture with them when you are signing the license

Wednesday, June 5, 2013

Wedding Traditions to Keep

I was recently reading an article about how all of these wedding traditions were out of style and how they needed to go away.  They were old fashion, today's couples don't want those things at there wedding.  Why not take the concept of these old traditions and modernize them? 

Having the Bride's Father Give Her Away

It is understandable in this world of step parents,  and adoptive parents, that sometimes there is more than one 'Dad' in your life.  Some Bride's choose not to pick between them for this honor, and walk alone down the aisle.  But, there are a lot of other solutions, the Bride could have both Dad's one on each side.  One Dad could walk her half way with the other taking her to the altar. 

I've been to many weddings where Mom(s) gave the Bride away.  Uncles are very popular, and don't forget about Grandfathers.  The important men in a Bride's (and Groom's) life can also be honored with a special dance after dinner.

Something Old, Something New, Something Borrowed, Something Blue

One of my favorites.  Easy to Update.  Be Creative!

Something Old -

Momma's pearls
Momma's dress
Pin one of your Grandmother's broaches to your flowers or the inside of your dress (or suit).
Momma's, Grandmother's, or Sister's Veil

Something New -

Dress (or Suit)
Shoes (go all out!)

Something Borrowed -

Momma's pearls
Dad's Handkerchief
Niece's Hair band, tied around your flowers
Nephew's Baseball Card tucked into your belt or sash

Something Blue -

ditch the blue garter...

Shoes (or just paint your wedding date in blue on the bottoms, which will make a great picture!)
Sash, ribbon or bow on the back of your dress
Jewelry, little accent pieces, small earrings, pendants

Throwing the Bouquet

I know, people don't like the little girls running around, you can have all the little ones come out and you can throw some candy for them and then let the big girls at the Bouquet.  Make sure that your florist makes a bouquet for to throw, because you will not want to give away yours.

Cutting the Cake

What is a wedding without cake?  Some many couples are choosing to move away from one large cake, and are serving actual dessert, or cupcakes.  These are not bad trends, but with most venue's offering a cake with the catering package, sometimes it doesn't make financial sense to turn down the free cake and pay for cupcakes. Go with the cake, do the ceremonial first bite (smashing is optional) and then have the entire cake (expect for the top layer) cut, and what your guests don't eat after dinner, have the leftovers put in cake boxes and left on the place card table for guests to grab when as they leave.  If you are essentially getting a free cake, you can still have the your sweet table thing.  What I don't like, is when people have one cake for their bridal party (or family) and then serve their guests sheet cake, if you are going to do that, skip the cake.